Tuesday, March 19, 2013

Alone

With a glimmer of hope in her eye,
     she waved the past good-bye,
and disappeared into the night.
     No one cared, no one gave a cry.


She searched the land for a white knight
     to set her future path aright.
Prayed someone would hear her heart’s call,
     but no man would hear her plight.


          Alone after all,
               she built up a wall;
          vowed never to try
               -never to fall














dVerse Open Link Night

9 comments:

  1. sad that she gave up...never to hurt again, but what life would that be...

    the last line of the first stanza, is it that long to fit the form? gave a cry, i would replace with cried for the rhythm...but if its a form then what can you do...smiles...i always break form...ha...

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  2. I have been blessed that the Lord helped me tear down the walls I had built over the years, freedom was waiting...
    good write

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  3. I can really relate to this! The first stanza truly caught my heartstrings. Love this!

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  4. This is so sad ... I hope someone breaks through the wall and helps her !!!

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  5. Anonymous3/20/2013

    Maybe she was speaking to the wrong men?
    I tend to agree along the lines of what Brian mentioned,

    No one cared, nor heard her cries?? Might something like that work?

    Someone, somewhere, somehow will breach those walls, they always do, probably when you least expect it. Very sad piece and I hate to start a day reading sad, but something in this did grab me enough to want to look it over. The image is a perfect fit for the words.

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  6. Anonymous3/20/2013

    The image and the words fit so very well together. Its not pleasant being hurt, but better to have been hurt than to never have tried.

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  7. Anonymous3/20/2013

    Such a beautiful and emotionally potent poem.
    Love it
    cheers
    Vishal
    www.vishalbheeroo.wordpress.com
    vishal-newkidonblogspot.com

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  8. But this wall of solitude is so self harming. It's better to try and fail than to never try at all.

    Lovely verses, you set me thinking with this one.

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  9. nice commentary on internal emotions and how they can become externalized through altered personality and actions that result from such a shift. Really nicely done. Thanks

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Praise, constructive criticism, and discussions welcome. Pure negativity and rudeness will not be approved or tolerated.