she waved the past good-bye,
and disappeared into the night.
No one cared, no one gave a cry.
She searched the land for a white knight
to set her future path aright.
Prayed someone would hear her heart’s call,
but no man would hear her plight.
Alone after all,
she built up a wall;
vowed never to try
-never to falldVerse Open Link Night
sad that she gave up...never to hurt again, but what life would that be...
ReplyDeletethe last line of the first stanza, is it that long to fit the form? gave a cry, i would replace with cried for the rhythm...but if its a form then what can you do...smiles...i always break form...ha...
I have been blessed that the Lord helped me tear down the walls I had built over the years, freedom was waiting...
ReplyDeletegood write
I can really relate to this! The first stanza truly caught my heartstrings. Love this!
ReplyDeleteThis is so sad ... I hope someone breaks through the wall and helps her !!!
ReplyDeleteMaybe she was speaking to the wrong men?
ReplyDeleteI tend to agree along the lines of what Brian mentioned,
No one cared, nor heard her cries?? Might something like that work?
Someone, somewhere, somehow will breach those walls, they always do, probably when you least expect it. Very sad piece and I hate to start a day reading sad, but something in this did grab me enough to want to look it over. The image is a perfect fit for the words.
The image and the words fit so very well together. Its not pleasant being hurt, but better to have been hurt than to never have tried.
ReplyDeleteSuch a beautiful and emotionally potent poem.
ReplyDeleteLove it
cheers
Vishal
www.vishalbheeroo.wordpress.com
vishal-newkidonblogspot.com
But this wall of solitude is so self harming. It's better to try and fail than to never try at all.
ReplyDeleteLovely verses, you set me thinking with this one.
nice commentary on internal emotions and how they can become externalized through altered personality and actions that result from such a shift. Really nicely done. Thanks
ReplyDelete